“Valentine’s Day was a special day for me. The Lord saved me as a single mom out of an immoral lifestyle on August 16, 2008. By God’s grace, the Spirit worked a powerful and transforming work of repentance in my life. Soon after, I started praying for a godly husband and father for Noah. February 14, 2009, was my first Valentine’s Day as a born-again Christian. I had just turned 23. I was sad God hadn’t answered my prayer for a date that day. Noah was only two years old so I decided to take him on the trolley. He had been wanting to go on the ‘train’ for some time. That date with little Noah, my heart was flooded with God’s love. The Lord used a verse reference printed on the bottom of a Forever 21 shopping bag to open the door for me to share the gospel with a young girl. It was exhilarating. I remember driving to the train station and asking God to reveal to me the extent of His love. On our way home, I was awestruck by the thought of how overwhelmingly great His love is. I told Josh this story, and we agreed on a Valentine’s Day wedding. Josh was happy our anniversary would be easier to remember. I thought it sweet of the Lord to answer my prayer for a “date” on Valentine’s Day four years later with a husband.” (On Loan from the Lord).
Praise the Lord for this answer to prayer! Marriage was one of the best gifts of my life after salvation. At trying times, I’ve been tempted to wonder why God would take this wonderful gift away? Honestly, I don’t know and may never get the answer to this question. However because of how sure I am about God’s goodness and love I can say like Job, “The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away. Blessed be the name of the LORD.” For I know the Father’s loyal love never abandons His children nor forsakes us because Jesus was forsaken in our place as a result of our sin. There is now nothing that can take His love away (Romans 8). As another Valentine’s Day approaches I can pray again now with even more expectation that God would show me how much he loves me, and look to the cross, “God demonstrates His own love for us that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Yet I can still pray for another “date” with a godly man if He wills. The Bible says young widows should marry so I believe He does will. Some will judge widows and widowers for the desire to remarry, but I doubt they have walked the rocky road themselves. All young widows I’ve asked about this, said they desire remarriage. It’s not that one is looking to replace our old spouse. That would never even be possible—nor our hearts desire. The one who has tasted the goodness of the Lord in marriage by God’s design naturally would want to smile again and embark on a new adventure. It would be a new journey. And a completely different person and thus a distinct relationship. Parents love their children the same even if they have more than one, or if a child has died and they have a new baby. In the same way a widow can love a new man as much as she loved her deceased husband. When we look at what the Bible defines as agape love this become crystal clear. Love means sacrifice—laying down our life for another. “Jesus demonstrates His own love that while we were still sinners Christ died for us.” For a widow to love again would mean that she is willing to lay down her life and live a new life devoted to a new man. For a man to be willing to love a widow would mean laying down his life to embrace her and her children. Wouldn’t that just shout the gospel? The story of my late husband redeeming me in marriage beautify displayed the gospel and that is why I would do it again if God gave me the opportunity. Moreover, I would want to take all that I learned from the past (mistakes and victories alike) to be an even better wife. A widow desires to remarry because they want another chance at human love as a reflection of God’s love. And they will likely never take their spouse for granted—for they know by experience that marriage is not eternal but momentary portrait of the forever love of Christ.
*”On Loan from the Lord” is available on Amazon and Kindle